I have had some shitfully craptacular news today. Apologies for the length but I need to put this story out as far and wide as possible to get any help and advice needed.
My scarily awesome Cyclone is 6 and is on the Autism Spectrum, and most likely ADHD. He started at a brilliant school at the start of the year but it was clear it was too stressful for him. He is very anxious, finds it hard to concentrate and can get very cross when frustrated. Apart from that he is wonderful and a very bright little spark.
We were referred by his current school to a new school that specializes in Spectrum Kids and ones that aren't coping well. They attend this school for one year, then are transferred back to mainstream school with a whole new confidence. They have an amazing track record of literally changing kids lives.
There are NO other schools that cater to kids like this. It is independent. I had several calls/meeting with the principal of "N School" and she said they could certainly help us out and we organised for Cyclone to start Term 3.
3rd June, 1st meeting at school with principal after several long phone calls.
11th June, Cycone had trial run at N School. He ran out of the classroom after about 30 mins and waited by the car.
Told shortly after that he could not attend N School in Term 3 due to – running out of the classroom. She brought up the fact that the school is on a main road and there were safety issues if he was to run out of the school again. Principal apologized and told me “I know it’s not the news you were expecting” and that they could definitely take him for Term 4 – he just ‘wasn’t the right fit right now’ and after I asked her what I should do with him, she advised me to call Current School and ask if they could keep him in a ‘holding pattern’ as they had already been doing for Term 2. I did not think this was a good idea, she asked me to press Current School to so do, for just one more term. I asked her again if they would definitely take him for term 4, she said yes.
I called several autism services/advisors and asked for their advice.
Discussed situation with several family and friends.
Decided reluctantly to homeschool. Advised N school Principal, she was not happy with this and felt he would get too used to being at home and out of a school routine. I advised I would do my best to keep the routine, and after all it was only one term.
I have since spoken to Principal at least 3 times, to advise her of our progress at home and with professional services and to ask her if there was anything further I could to do help his transition to the N School.
The second to last phone call I rang to arrange for Principal to come and observe him at the local library where we do some of our lessons(her request). She said she didn’t have her diary there but would call me in two weeks to arrange a time. I let her know any time was ok with us.
I have not heard from Principal since, but called today – ready for her to again bring up his homeschooling, but instead was told – that she ‘had it in her head that I was going to call her’, that there had obviously been a miscommunication between us both…(sorry, no). I said nevermind I was calling to make an appointment to formally enroll him ready for next term. She pauses then tells me that there is no place available for him.
I completely contained myself and nearly popped several veins in the process – here is a brief outline of the conversation.
Me – are you kidding me, what do you mean there is no place available? You told me he couldn’t go in term 3 but you could accommodate him in Term 4.
Her – I didn’t say that.
Me – yes you did, we have had several conversations about him starting next term, I have been speaking to you since May. I have spent the last 8 weeks homeschooling my son and preparing him for this, you are well aware of the situation.
Her – well I had it in my head that you were to call me, there appears to be a communication breakdown between us. The place has gone to someone else. I’m sorry, this doesn’t seem fair does it?
Me – regardless of you thinking I was to call you – was there a point you were going to call me and advise you had changed your mind about my son, did you think I had all of a sudden forgotten he was to attend?
Her – I have several families needing places here.
Me – have they been waiting as long as I have? Where is the priority here? Are you aware the effect that this has had on my life – are these other children still able to attend school, my son isn’t and needs to get back into the education system. You are the one that kept telling me homeschooling wasn’t the answer. Why have things changed?
Look it goes on and on, but at the end of the day she has nothing and can’t answer any of my questions.
1) She has stuffed up royally and expects me to walk away.
2) All kids need to be assessed – he has had ONE trial day and the principal wasn’t even there and has not met him. How can she assess him?
3) This is a private school, so yes they can pick and choose who attends. This will be a problem but I don’t see why I can’t put some sort of pressure on them to accept him. Especially in the light of the fact I was TOLD he was accepted. If I was told at any time that he didn’t have a definite place I would have made a backup plan.
The backup plan would have involved another school with a huge transition program put in place and these things take time. I also would probably NOT have chosen to homeschool and look for alternatives much much earlier. It is now 2 weeks from the end of term so Cyclone is totally stuffed. You would not believe the stress and pressure I have gone through trying to make sure he is keeping up with his ABC’s, doing physical therapy and running him to 8000 appointments.
I can’t keep him out of school another term, I just can’t. I’m not a fricken professional teacher, OT or psychologist. I cannot offer what he needs alone.
Our neurotherapist just can't believe what is going on, and will call the Principal tomorrow to try and sort something.
What else can I do? Who can I contact? The school board? The Stupidhead Principle Police?
If you are a teacher, can you advise me? What other sort of pressure can I put to get him in? TRUST ME, I will do all I can.
Email luluandcyclone@gmail.com
Please, if you know anyone who works in Education, particularly private can you please ask if they know the correct channels to address this.
And, lastly if you think (or know from experience) that I am up the creek in a barbed wire canoe, please let me know...but just do it gently.
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