Thursday, January 7, 2010

Disco Destructo

I entered a photo competition recently, the theme was ME. Here is one of the shots I nearly entered.
It accurately represents me, awesome shoes and power tools. If you look at the pane of glass behind you can see a large crack in it – that’s pretty representative of my and my life too – always bloody fixing something…

Anyhoo, the crack stayed there happily for a few weeks but after one too many slams of the sliding door put too much stress on it and suddenly a chunk of glass about the size and shape of an American football dropped out. Eye rolling, shoulder shrugging and rude words aren’t going to fix anything, but I do get personal satisfaction out of implementing these actions. At least the kids weren’t home, so I could ignore it for a few days and wonder out of which orifice I am going to pull the money to fix it. I’m brokedy broke broke broke right now.

Last week I found some lovely lamb offcuts for the dogs. As usual I fed Fluffy Mutt in the laundry and Disco outside. Disco is a piglet that uses mafia-type standover tactics to rip the mutts food from her, because she literally INHALES food and Fluffy Mutt takes a dainty 20 minutes to dine.
It was all too much for Disco, she ran all the way around the house to see if she could sneak in the side door. I am too smart for her (NOW) and lock it otherwise she somehow manages to open it. Foiled again Disco – or was she?

The bloody dog jumped through the window.

Yes she did. Put her nose though the hole, got another big whiff of lamb chop and decided to go for gold. Oh the noise!!!! It scared the bejaysus outta me. The whole thing went in slow motion, I heard a crack and turned around to see her flying through the window with hundreds of glittering shards of glass floating around her. Looked a bit spectacular in the sunlight actually.
Luckily she was totally fine (I have no idea how), looked bewildered for a second or two before heading straight to Fluffy Mutts chops and hoovered them up.

Bad shot but at least she looks suitably ashamed.