Thursday, February 4, 2010

Are you working, or taking a break from the kids?

I'm responding to a blog post of a friend Mrs Hawk - here at Just Me. In which she is NOT happy at those that question her returning to work an extra day is "a break from the kids". Sarah says NO!

I however say YES!

So everyone has a different therefore those that ask that may well be in a similar situation to mine which is why they might ask the question....maybe even with a smirk.

Cyclone was an "unsettled" baby. From the moment he was born he was distressed. He fed every 90mins- 2hrs (if I was lucky) until he was 4 months old. I still remember (5 years later, with some fondness) of him being passed back to me by Scorpio with his little mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. Numnums boobies.
I still have the notes I took of his sleeping patterns in sheer desperation, showing he was sleeping 8 out of 24 hours. O my goodness.
He screamed, he sobbed, he arched his tiny little back and I stayed in bed with him for 3 months.

When he was 5 months old I was to return to work. HELL YEAH I said. 2 days per week, I can do that...I welcomed the prospect of feeling "normal" again. I attached myself to the breastpump dreaming of wearing real clothes and makeup again.
Keep in mind I worked at a Government agency well known for having to deal with tanties and chair-throwers. A veritable walk in the park compared to the battle zone of my home.

In a little while Betty Boo came along. 2 under 2!

By this stage I had started my own business working from home. Not all it's cracked up to be. I was taking calls with my foot wedged against the door trying to talk over the tantrums and mummymummymummy MUMMMMEEEEE!
Scorpio was recovering from a knee operation back then so he was at home. I bought a laptop and bought me some time too.

The only way I could get any work done was to leave the house. And go to the PUB. Yep, there I sat, laptop on the table and a frosty pot next to it. The amount of work I got done in 2 hours was phenomenal.

I got sucked back into aforementioned Goverment job with tanty throwing customers. Still it WAS a break from home. No stereo mummy mummymummymummyMUMMMEEEEE! If someone was rude I hung up on them. If someone threw a chair I ducked, laughed and spoke firmly about respect and boundaries. THEY listened.

And best of all - no one followed me into the toilet. I went alllll by myself. In peace.

The one time I ooops! said to a colleague "mummy has to do wees" - she didn't bat an eyelid. She knew.

So in conclusion - sometimes it IS a break from the kids when you go back to work. Sometimes it's not....after all, there is always the washing to be done and beds to bed made.



Kellyansapansa said...

I had already read Sarah's post, so it was great to read an different viewpoint. I have never had kids and don't plan to, as I love my work and my "me time" too much to have someone reliant on me all the time. Am I selfish? Absolutely! Am I happy with my choice? Absolutely!

Lulu said...

I don't think you are selfish at all Kelly! Not one bit, they are fabulous reasons for not having kids..not selfish xoxoxo

Lady Astrid said...

ooh, yes. Agree about it being some what of a break. Been chatting to my counsellor about this and she even suggests for my own mental health that I may be better returning to work.

For me it is so great to get the brain cells ticking over on something more interesting that what to serve up for lunch and yes, to be able to have a cuppa without interruption. Bliss!

lori said...

OMG!! You had notes of your baby's habits to see if there was any inkling of a pattern too?? So did I! Guess what? NO PATTERN! Whenever I get that "I might want another baby" feeling, I pull them out and read them. They do the trick.