Expect your child to try and break the bond between you and them. They are trying to become independent and lets face it, when you want to be BIG the parents have gotta go.
I told Teen Queen that I would ‘teach her to drink’. This did not mean giving her the taste so she could win drinking competitions at the local pub. More like a modern “Keeping Yourself Nice”.
I let her have a taste of the drink I was drinking whilst cooking dinner. She learnt to identify what taste (if any) and if it was too strong.
I explained the term ‘standard drink’, showed her a 30ml measure. I went over how alcohol can affect a person differently due to weight, the time of your menstrual cycle, if you have eaten etc.
I DID tell her in no uncertain terms that she wasn’t to drink those ridiculous alcopops or any other nasty cheap stuff. Standards people, standards!
NEVER to let anyone else mix a drink for her or to leave a drink unattended. I gave her more real life reasons for this.
I told her that without a doubt that any male who wanted to buy/provide an underage teenage girl a drink was up to no good and to avoid them at all costs. ALL COSTS. Yes darling Teen Queen you are beautiful and interesting, but these men/boys just want to get into your knickers.
I didn’t go on about the reasons why Teen Queen shouldn’t drink - there is a part of the teenage brain that immediately switches off when it senses a lecture approaching – I gave her information and hoped that she used it. HOPED??? Hoped – you say?? Will that be enough? I think it has to be, it’s not like I would be able to tag along everywhere she went.
I didn’t “sit her down” or sermonize, I didn’t speak to her like a child. I used whatever opportunities arose day to day. This went on over a period of years. All of this time I dropped her off and picked her up from parties. I called nearly every friends parents and introduced myself – I made quite a few connections with other parents with the same values as I.
Did it work? I’ll tell you next week……
brought to you by the nutter Lori at
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The Birth of Venus
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It is said that Zeus ate his wife when she was pregnant with Athena. It had
been prophesied that the child would be more powerful than Zeus, and I
guess ...
2 comments:
As someone who was a teenager not very long ago... *blush* (last year!) I think what you said and did was perfect. My parents went for the "drinking is forbidden" approach and it did not work at all. They were possibly the strictest parents in existence and I still got up to no good. You are spot on about the part of the teenage brain that just switches off at the mere idea of a lecture - I think their brains are just programmed to rebel against anything parents say. I think she will take your advice on board - I would have if my parents had explained alcohol to me like that. Gawd I'm not looking forward to this stage with my girl! lol.
Found you through FlogYoBlog :)
I agree Lu, I never banned DD1 from drinking (just talked to her about dangers etc) and she has always been open about her drinking. Now she thinks I am cool cause I provide love and hangover cures LOL Not sure that was my aim but hey its no point being nasty to a person with a hangover.
mrsmac
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